i'm not really sure what i want to type today. in fact, i almost didn't write today.
i've been motivated to resume blogging semi-daily, but today i fought it. i wanted to write, but wasn't sure what to say. and, being a proponent of "silence is golden", i was about close the window and save insight for a new day. but, just i as i was about to click...i saw it.
it stares at me everyday in my office.
it is a formerly-sticky (the adhesive wore off long ago, so now it's got a pushpin in it) note with 5 words on it.
i wrote this note to my self quite a while ago after being challenged by one particular old codger. (i usually don't mind disagreeing with folks as long as we're on the same page, but i really wanted this guy out of the picture--i viewed him as poison to my flock). i've recited, quoted, called upon and dilberated about this a LOT over the years. the note simply asks: "bad heart or bad habit?"
this has become my standard of measurement for the goodness of man. i realize that i am not the judge. i don't claim that position, nor do i desire that position. but, the question forces me to look at the person through God's eyes.
God loves every person. they are His children, His creation. that doesn't mean He likes the way they act, or the things they say, or the habits they form, or the attitudes they display.
do i love them the say way?
back to the old codger...
i honestly think he viewed grumpiness as his spiritual gift. it's not on any list in scripture, but it might have been written in his margins. but i realized, through seeking answer to the question, that he did, in fact, have a good heart. he just had a bad habit of being grumpy. this definately, on the jared-scale, scored him higher than some sociopath that had bad habits fueled by their bad, ugly, unrepentently-sinful heart.
so, i thought that's what i'd write about today--the old codger, whom i am sure is now with the Lord.
except, as i was typing, i realized i needed to ask the question about myself. (i hate mirrors.).
more to come as i explore that question.